My first encounter with a bidet was in 1985. I was a teenager at the time and my mother and I were on a two-week trip to Spain sponsored by my high school Spanish club. We had just checked into our hotel room in Madrid after a long overnight flight from Chicago.

It all began with our annual plumbing inspection. We probably spend more for it than we should, but the plumbers at the company we use are always courteous, punctual, and get the work done correctly the first time.

THE SECOND THURSDAY CIRCLE OF GRACE

Cooking with Grace:

Recipes for the Spiritually Overdone

Vol. 1, Issue 7 • Mimeographed with Love

and Cooking Sherry

If Janice Higdon asks me to “return thanks” at these monthly luncheons one more time, I swear I’m going to start attending the Unitarian Universalist church over on West Maple. When you’ve spent a lifetime watching people spoon Miracle Whip onto pineapple rings while repressing generational trauma, at some point you decide enough is enough.

The first time I recall someone saying that to me, it wasn’t an accusation so much as a diagnosis.